In honor of all that is spooky in October, I’d like to discuss death, cemeteries and specifically tombstones.

Losing a loved one is like losing a piece of yourself, the infinite hole that is dug in your chest never seems to heal. We are constantly surprised, angered and afraid of death…Yet it is more common than the flu, a flat tire and a mosquito bite. Some cultures believe the dead exist among them forever so they do not mourn their loss; they celebrate the life once lived. In other cultures for example, the mourning never ceases, widows wear black for the rest of their lives. Luckily for them, black is always in style.

Cemeteries have always had an air of romance to me. There is something about a place where so many different walks of life are buried that fascinates me. The stories of heartache, family, love, passion, crime, greed and death collected in a single field dwelling just a few feet below ground is both spooky and thrilling. How many of those people took secrets to the graves with them? How many of them had one last wish never granted? How many did exactly what they wanted, when they wanted?

Do you believe in spirits? I find it hard to believe that death is the end of life. Perhaps life as we know it is over, but to what extent is there a remaining force lingering in the air…have you ever felt a presence?

Finally, the subject of tombstones comes to mind. Tombstones symbolize the end of life and who you were but imagine if we begun life the same way with birthstones…what would yours say?

“Today, I was born…I would like to this kind of person and hope to accomplish the following things while I live:”

For example:

Birthstone:

John Smith,

“Hi, it’s nice to be here. I would like to free the world of anger, and madness. Bring back the beauty of nature and maybe start a non-profit. I’d like to save the whales and adopt-a-highway. I will have 2 children and a loving wife. My legacy will be one of peace and harmony”

Tombstone:

John Smith

“Lawyer, bloodsucker, ambulance chaser. Twice divorced, thrice bankrupt, late on child support and an owner of 2 SUV’s. He never recycled and once ran over a squirrel just to see how fast it would run. John leaves behind a mortgage and one hell of a cholesterol level”

Perhaps we should think about writing our birthstones today and trying to live up to them so that both our birth and tombstones may be one and the same.