In an effort to be more involved in my work place, I volunteered to bake things for our bake sale. Now, before I begin to explain my evening of “fun”, I would like to make one thing very clear: I do not bake and I never EVER have. That’s right, not even brownies from a box. Sure, I’ve seen my mom and friends do it from time to time, but have I actively participated? Certainly not! I am always in charge of beverages (my specialty). Speaking of beverages, I celebrated my friends’ birthday before I baked…so I may or may not have had a few glasses of wine….
So with that said…let’s discuss instructions on a box. I wish I would have been warned that baking is an EXACT science. It’s not a pinch of cinnamon here, a dab of butter there, let’s thrown in another egg for moisture…etc. You have to actually follow instructions/rules/laws/theman’sorders and for those of you that know me somewhat, well then you know that’s not my forte.
In hindsight:
When your friend is sending texts like these to the rest of your friends, realize that they know you very well, and have no confidence in your cooking skills. Who can blame them?
“OneLove is coming over to have some wine and maybe bake, you should come too.”
Some other memorable quotes from the evening:
“By the way baking is so much harder than it looks”.
“What about decorating”?
“Are u sure u put 1/4 cup of butter”
“I don't know I didn't look but it exploded in your microwave”
And of course my favorites:
“What's the friggin difference between butter and eggs don't they both come from cows?” -In defense of the offender, copious a mounts of wine were drank and may have contributed to the kindergarten food group memory lapse.
Not so innocent bystander: “Is this the first time you make brownies? You should buy the pre-made ones next time.”
Final result: Rum flavored balls and a strange chocolate chip cookie brownie mix. All in all, a huge success. NOT. But man was it fun!
